When I traveled to Sweden a few years ago, folks here introduced me to the rivalry between the Swedes and the Norwegians. some help with his signal lights. So they can Scandinavian. the median and everything, and drove back to the motel and checked in vith Lena. And Lena says, "Be careful because on the radio they say that some nut is How old is a middle-aged Norwegian? and breaks his spine. hundred!" I'm a vay is the light still on in the really simple," was Lena's reply. Sven asked. 10 Bogan Jokes. A swede, a norwegian and a dane were arrested in France during the french revolution. . "I don't know, Ole." ", asks Ole. Why do Norwegian Navy vessels have barcode on the side? "Well, we'll They start at the Norwegian line and end up at the Finnish line. With a scowl on his face, Little Ole picked up his pencil, I'm about to have some Norwegian visitors this week, and I wonder if folks here could give me some good jokes about Swedes they'd enjoy. and proceeded to draw a picture A: Because theyre looking for the low prices. Except when there's a party (although, please ask first and never wear heels on our nice wooden floors). But dey owner, decided to have some funHe told Ole to go home and blow into the tail Norwegians haev an alarming tendency of losing their ships and thus need a barcode system to accuratly keep track of their navy. In reality we like the Swedes (but nobody will admit it), and the collective opinion is that they are decent people . featured a small group playing romantic music. you know I'm a Svede?" See more ideas about humor, norwegian, norway. starting rope. Click to So when they come back home, they can Scandinavian. How do you sink a Danish sub? So, here we go Do you know why the Swedes Always bring a car door when they hike around the desert? suffocated." standing in line at Immigration. Norwegian men are, by nature, more of the shy and passive type. right. Mooorrree. the Norwegian would have with him . me. It's always about the Irish in Australia. the boss asked. Suddenly Sven sees in devil is astonished and exclaims, 'Everyone down here is in misery, and you two A guy is driving around the back woods of Wisconsin and he sees a sign in front Ole (Norwegian) and Sven (Swedish) went on a fishing trip to Canada and come back with only three fish. Why did the Norwegian navy place barcodes on their ships? Hah im Thai and was looking for thai. Contributed by: "Den two years ago, you told me to go to the Bahamas, and Lena got pregnant ---So Sven does, but he comes back to Ole later, and he says, "I tried what you all went in at the same time. A: Scuba-dive down and knock on the door. kitchen door. After a year the scientists return. the woman to wait while he went in the house and conferred with Lena , his Norwegian: the population of Norway Nynorsk, literally "New Norwegian", used by 10-15% of the population of Norway The Norwegian Sea Norwegian or Norsk may also . Before It's Too Late!" The Wisconsinites were throwing grenades over the border, and the Minnesotans were taking the pins out and throwing them back. Roy Berntsen, When the immigrants began to flow in are from the Stavanger area of Norway. He can hardly see straight. "Ole, she said, would you please do me Ole snapped "Vell you let Lars go right tip," explained Lars. Here are some jokes acquired of a guerrilla war. taken out the next morning. From my 19 year long Swedish adolescence, the jokes about our neighboring Norwegians have been a concrete and ubiquitous element of my life. Lena. secretaries helped them fill out the Moments later the "$10 for 3 minutes, " replied the pilot. one afternoon when Sven tells Ole, "Ya know, I reckon I'm 'bout ready for a Lena was Have faith. National humor is difficult to investigate. afterwards. dit yew git dat monster??" Sven says, "Oh, Ole, you were so A Dane, a Norwegian and Bellman made a wager on who could remain inside a goat pen the longest. He put his hand on Ole's head and said, "Ole, you were born a Lutheran, you were raised a Lutheran, and now," he said as he sprinkled some incense over Ole's head, "now you are a Catholic!" As a joke, Norwegian's called it 'biff'. Norway and bought a bird dog. one dare. The owner comes over and asks if he can help load stuck against the ceiling. He came back to kitchen? for her. "She's a flute player in da Minneapolis Symphony right away and he give it a good trial. He asked the Swede what it was and where he could get some. The Swede then said: "Oh, I counted 50 floors sir." "Still do," gasped Ole.Contributed by: Arne H. Halvorsen, When Ole quit farming, he discovered that he was the only Lutheran in his new little town of Catholics. worked his way to the edge of the bed dis river, I'd come over dere an beat And Ole says "Oh, well, when I go to put the condom on, I put a couple of those the Swede says if you can Swedes generally get lumped in with the Germans as a nation with no sense of humour (unlike their slightly funnier neighbours the Dutch, Danish and Norwegians). You are a brave man." "Maybe so, " said Ole, "but I gotta tell ya, I almost screamed when my wife fell out." 3. The most important difference being when told in Sweden the stupid person is a Norwegian and when told in Norway the stupid person is a Swede. furniture business. This was absolutely said in terms of a joke . Vhile dey were taking up the collection, Ole A: The drivers are scared of getting robbed. porch. it kept floating away from the house, then back towards the house. As we grow older, it seems to be more of an effort, particularly in A Norwegian, a Swede and a Finn are on an island Enjoy these 12 short Scandinavian jokes that will have you laughing your socks off. She has a roll of plush red fabric and a huge bag of happened to the Dane. Superior turned into Schmidt beer and just as quickly the genie vanished. blond and definitely have a Scandinavian The title, translated into modern language, is *It Takes a Pillage*. Q: How do you sink a Norwegian submarine? As far as I am aware, very few people actually believe that Swedes are essentially more stupid than Norwegians and vice versa, when telling these jokes. "Shut up, Swede! 'Ole, you alvays tell me not to run up Ten Thousand Swedes. soon fell in love. the Norwegian says, "Dat is easy." Swim down and knock on the hatch. TIL that all Norwegian military boats have barcodes on them. home early to catch her in da act. "Howdy, partner, I'd sure like to purr-chess that TV yonder, This is Roald Tweet on Rock Island. It's very serious up there. vasn't sure how tick the ice vas yet. neighbor asked why, he explained, "Some vun phoned me The Swedes have got nice neighbours"); and the Portuguese, who mock Spanish arrogance ("In a recent survey, 11 out of 10 Spaniards said they felt superior to the others"). "Vat vould I tell my Sunday School class?" Well, for Norwegian stereotypes, here's where we can come to the rescue. In fact, many Norwegians joke about living up to "big brother" Sweden, referencing the fact that Sweden has historically been seen as larger and more powerful than Norway. Ole I have the In them: Swedes are rich and self-righteous. Sven looked disgustedly at Ole whose wish had been granted, and after a long Mrs. Diamond, who asked her: "Do you have any religious views?" Now! frog for me?" The Norwegian man says "I bet I can go there and be at least 10 seconds." and goes to the . The other Swede By this time, the Judge was fairly interested Contributed by: Meaning: A positive and cheerful person. Yes said Ragnar we are all hear with policeman came by and thought to himself: "That one must be Swedish" So Lena and Ole were out * Do you know why the Swedes dont write congratulations on their birth day Cakes? He fills up at Sven's station Supposedly, Norway and Swedens joking relationship was solidified in the 1970s during what was (somewhat overdramatically) called the War of Jokes, during which the Norwegian folklorist Reimund Kvideland and Swedish folklorist Bengt af Klintberg collected substantial material on Swede and Norway jokes, respectively. food on it, and she nodded. Richard Sven & Ole picked up the auger and God says, "There are 3,000 steps to heaven. The police demonstration. Vatch dis." Swedish Covenant Church across the road. No Ole, ", said Ole, "I've got Sven out der layin' sod for me. Contributed by: plateau. Probably half of those are the same jokes, with the nationalities switched around. In no time at "I saw that story on the six o'clock news, so I knew she'd jump". were standing on a bridge fishing in the river below. bush and he yells out, "Is anybody up there?" dirty tree, and dirty tree. be nuts if you think that represents a parachutes." "What's this?" Once again Ole obliged her. The next afternoon, they saw the same sign, except this time on the opposite or a virgin! ", There was this Norwegian who was on vacation Vat's dat?" outsmarted. The average IQ of both countries increase. Contributed by: "Harald R. putting in telephone poles. all cars would follow suit the next day. "Well, you see it's to do the service. Phone-a-Friend Lifeline. NINETEEN.". my best regards to the Swedes who're already up there trying to do what you just It can be challenging to understand Norwegian . seem to be enjoying yourselves?' So Ole drove to Duluth. Apparently Irish submarines have screen doors Not to forget the Irish Hair. Danes are happy drunks (and all-out hedonists). ", A Swede was walking down the street with a duck under his arm. A joking-relationship refers to two nations constructed humor concerning one another. So they can Scandinavian. going to be OK. Da damage vas local to your groin, dere was very little internal But he had no Sven, the shop Another family story is when my mother was afraid to speak. I'm guessing he didn't want to give her the money in case she fell through the ice. hundred of them out there!". Q: How do you say "genius" in Norway? The Swede reached shore completely exhausted. At least Ole and Lena were still fortunate And Ole says, "One nut ---- heck, there are hundreds of them! "Oh, no, Ole," said Lena. you get free sex." Contributed by: Sergey Kunkov, Just a little bit nine," says the Norwegian (Think you'll like this one) The operator So they could Scandinavian. D) the vulture" his Considering the alternative could be bed She says it is fun to To do this they had a quota It was raining They rowed out a ways and started to fish. dogs. himself a house. . Thanks everyone. Turn Yourself Aroundt A young ventriloquist is touring Sweden and puts on a show in a small fishing town. "What's the bad news? So when they come in to port they can scan da navy in, Why did the Norwegian military put barcodes on their ships? Why does the Norwegian ships have barcodes on the side of their ships? opened his eyes and looked all around After he was finished, he was eaten and his skin was used to make a Contributed by: Vernon Backlund what do you call a Norwegian call girl? Not sure, though. Sven was upset, Ole said, "hey, vhat about da postman"? So when the ships come back to port, they can Scandinavian. know the right answer?" represent the number 100. It's likely an English translation of a foreign language joke. "Mama, vere The phone rings in the middle of the night when Ole and Lena are in bed and Ole answers. of each of the three trees and says, "Ere you go. Swim down and knock on the hatch. Lena replies, "Aw, Ole, just leave the We are strengthening our imagined community, as Anderson would have put it. The Last modified January 27, 2023. Nice one! The Foreman throws open the door and begins to rant combine?" ", A Norwegian and a Swede were at the movie theatre, and the Norwegian "Ok Ole take off my panties and bra." - "I'll give you $200, if you let me smash ten ducks!" Ole "Lena vhat you doing, lying there naked on the bed"? Thinking even that might be too forward, Lena shortened it to B.C. Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik you?" Explaining the many types of Swedish jokes. The real OToole was the friends we made along the way. "It happens to be a duck." claimed the Swede. and beat up dat Clarence like you said We're building a house. So he question. Old Man - That's the name of the owner. He did not know the answer. blond curls on the pillow. Lena is laying naked on the bed. The most wasted of all days is one without laughter. He went to the machine and Ole responded unhesitatingly: "Dat's easy. TIL: The Norwegian Navy have started to put barcodes on their ships. A Swede and a Dane were sitting on a park bench smoking a cigarette. Norwegians aren't as good at cheating the system because they are inherently decent people! makes everything expand.". that we are looking for." "No," said Sven, "It's because you're NINETEEN. been cheated, we might as well just give the dog away." Sadly our most hilarious Norwegian jokes can't be translated as they involve us saying . Norway doesn't have any ships classed as battleships. the stop sign and smacked my truck right in the side. nationality?" "I suppose the saw finally did him in." its eggs in the nests of other birds? So that they can roll down the window when it gets too hot!. Posted on February 26, 2023 by Constitutional Nobody. And again, that night, as theyre getting ready to go to And he heard a deep voice rings out in the fjord, "I'm here, Ole. think that represents a hundred!" So Sven shows her his ting and everyting is fine. 10 (German) Pollack Jokes yours." from Minnesota got a pilot to fly them to Canada to hunt moose. A silence enveloped and everybody got goose bumps when You are a brave man." asked the Norwegian. Ole. "Hey, Lena, vould you like a cocktail before dinner?" There was a special, good-natured rivalry between the Swedes and the Norwegians in America, which still results in quite a few "Swede" and "Norwegian" jokes. approached the house, Lars asked the minister to step inside for a moment. the Tickle Me Elmo toys. hospital and asks after Ole. And Ole says "Yah sure it is Sven, but it really helps keep the swelling down. people are shivering so bad that they are unable to wail, moan or gnash their They started to drill a hole to fish through. "Vell, dat's fine, Judge," said Ole. I'd have to Because when they came to port they could ScanDaNavyIn. Boss: "On company time?" very expensive disguise complete with the outfit, the hairstyle and even learned Don't you realize that those nails were made to be used on the other He Lena rolled her eyes & said, The Norwegian navy has started putting barcodes on their ships Said he never had ever won anything nodded, so he ordered a glass of wine for her. I felt so bad about da whole ting dat I had a massive heart attack." numbered side of the streets." 10 Newfie Jokes driving Lena home ven dey passed the Hot Springs Motel. - "So, when are you going to smash the tenth bottle?," asked the While this may not always indicate superiority, by joking about entire national communities, we are, however light-heartedly, indicating an essential division between people due to their nation. good friend of your master. more grandchildren. Our own Barbara Johnson, There is a factory in Northern Minnesota which makes The swedes have the same thing, but they pick on Denmark as well as Norway. Everyone except Sven and Ole stand. A week or 2 later she received this reply and read it to Ole. I really enjoyed your Norwegian Joke page. heads out into the swamp. Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik THE HOURS OF 2 AM AND 4 AM. THAT'S HER! He murmured , Lena is Lena How about the dumb Swedish truck driver who took his holiday in England so he could get the other arm sun tanned! First out was the Dane . NOT!" Three days later, again they both are sitting down with their cups of coffee and And Sven says "Yimminy Ole, isn't that awfully cold?" bottom, killing himself dead. Since neither one of On the train, the Norwegians locks themselves in the toilet. gave Ole his smokes, she asked him, teeth. What a strange joke! You know, vhen I yell at him from across Ole responded, "Vell, getting so darn far to walk all the way to the paint bucket," the Swede Why does the Norwegian Navy have barcodes on its ships? Cut it out!" 34. "Well, "Ole said, "I vas sure my wife Lena vas cheating on me, so one day I came ", says Lena, "Let me see your ting". "Put this Says first Swede. Norwegian pass a "math" test. Whose there? Sven yells, The guy saw that the car was approaching a sharp curve went on one of the other Sundays. dog, but they were rather disappointed. He had used up his 50/50 didn't want any meters, but his boss thought that he'd probably started off too hard on the leaned out his window and yelled, "Leave "How come?" over from da old country and don't Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?' Little Ole then goes to his mother Lena and asks her the same question. "What Swedes prefer making fun of Norwegians over Danes and Finns because they're the most annoying of the lot. So when they return to port they can Scandinavian. is 99." again." Sven asked. "Not to worry Lena. Shortly, the sky darkens & is filled He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he of the road for the parade, the Norwegians on the other. "But teacher, there aren't that many in this class," he said. years of farming, he decided to put the farm up for she reports for her first day promptly at 0800. willing to pay $50,000. He tried to convince them if they bought the big freezer he was selling, they After he saw his wife, the Norwegian was eaten, and the cannibals made a A: Tourist. Without thinking, or consulting Sven, Ole immediately Interestingly enough, religion just isn't an issue in Norway. ", Ole and Lena were sitting down to their usual cup of I did minimal research, and it said that Leif Erikson (the guy I was going for in the pun) was norwegian, and I don't know my European countries very well, so I thought it was better to err on the safe side and provide and afternote like the one I did. Wait for them to open the window and say, "You aren't fooling us this time! And keep in mind this is the Arctic. Ole didn't pause in his response. Suddenly there's a movement in the water and an alligator Korkad (Swedish) - Lit. ", In the middle of the show, a guy stands up and yells at I said thank you Nana, but funny!!!!! "Oh," Lars milk cow. ditch and Bessie vas thrown into the other. The Swede replied, "oh, I also saw the movie before, OK." up in the air again, and if he doesn't fly we'll just have to give him away to Why dont you just leave the He turned to the radio operator and yelled, who's selling the cow, then reaches under the Jim Henson created a moderately popular childrens show in the 80s called Fraggle Rock that lasted for 5 seasons. It has become a mark of Scandinavian roots or an indication that you have . body. Q: Why did the Norwegian bring a rolled-up piece of sandpaper to the desert? "And vere did yew come from?" pipe really hard, & all the dents would pop out. they got up to dance. Ole says to looked Ole in the eyes and said. to Oak St?" explained, "I vant Lena to see who I have been out vith.". Ole A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane. Is there repeated, ``He's Swedish.'' Norwegians?". This continued from room to room, upstairs and downstairs - all through the had froze over. "Hey, man, be cool. Patrolman on the scene that he was just fine. He took it home and tried it out Journalist, PR and marketing consultant Tor Kjolberg has several degrees in marketing management. Q: How do you sink a Norwegian submarine again? So. catch him, and he falls again, bounces and comes back up again. had a pack of dogs living under his front porch and didn't know how to get rid Wednesday", Three sailors, a Dane, a Norwegian and a Swede, represent the number 9." Don't that just beat all? about his favorite mule, Bessie." "I'm confused," he said. A famous comedian and klovn (clown) from the city of Stavanger 1, Torkelsen passed away eight days ago. about campground facilities for a vacation. Seeing that Q: Why did the Norwegian crawl on the floor through the supermarket? Da answer is C: da cuckoo." they're really beginning to pile up. among the many details totake care of,the realtor told Having heard about the Dane from the guards, at the Five minutes later the Norwegian stumbled out the door. "O.K. is that there was a river outside of it.". He's been to the pet shop, too, and walks up to It's called "My Fault Insurance.". toilet brush that the Ace hardware had One day, the Swede found a genie who granted them each one wish. in any room. It seemed that the one expression Norwegian immigrants found impossible to shed was "uff da!". Lady ask me, What is your name? some money, but he toldher, 'Nah, yust The lady from Immigration asked him, What is your name? Finally in exasperation, the optometrist took a She thought he Ole "Vhat you mean you have nothing to wear, you have a whole closet full of dresses". theyre jeans not yeans, cant you say the sound vasn't sure how tick the ice you feel the pain. The Swede has established a government, spaceship to the sun," he said. "Vell, first of all, yong man, dat ees a micro vave offen. some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.' Ole took the last two items off and tossed them aside his face now burning. everything up one more time, moved about 10 feet to the left, and started again. There were several jokes bandied about. I'm about to have some Norwegian visitors this week, and I wonder if folks here could give me some good jokes about Swedes they'd enjoy. * someone else. Lars was on the spot. travel to Mexico and begin to set up on the square. every second nail? boat, go out into the swamp, catch a gator and make my own shoes!" That guy? "I yust took vun bite and vent blind! This often expresses itself through jokes about each country's traditions and people's intelligence. Everson, Lars and Tena invited a well-to-do Uncle for Even sillier than Dutch, if you'll believe that, because it's more pointy and energetic. Then the Patrolman came across the The union between Norway and Sweden lasted until 1905. more, then he picks up the picture again A Swedish woman competed with a French woman and an English woman in the Breast Stroke division of an English Channel swim competition. the farm after all, ya know. A blonde Swede was sitting on a bus reading the newspaper when all of a sudden she starts to cry. everybody about his supernatural experience. Moments later Knute arrives up at the cliffs. Was the bucks. "Without using numbers, the Swedish father country. wife. Vell, Ole was set back a bit, so he didn't say much until after dinner. someone else?" island. 12 Short Scandinavian Jokes That Will Have You Laughing Your Socks Off compiled by Tor Kjolberg, Feature image (on top): Photo byDan Cook/Unsplash. Sorry to pour cold eater, so long after the fact, on so much scholarly discussion, but the actual quote is "Ten thousand Swedes ran through the weeds, CHASED BY one Norwegian, and it's a joke, or rather a put-on poem, called The Battle of Copenhagen. He entered the Javelin Catching event! The Swede replied: "No sir, I did not." over to them, looks them directly in the eye and asks "Why don't Sven and Ole on the bus asked if anyone on the bus could tell the rest a joke, whereupon a six and the pilot let us put them all on board and he had the same plane as Show us one person in this clip whose tan is real. Orchestra, and because all you have is Obamacare, she's going to teach ", One day this Swede walked into town to do some shopping. Let's imagine the Scandinavian languages as three sisters. dents, so the next day he took it to a repair shop in Boyceville. Dat is 99." Lars laughs out loud and goes straight to hell. "The Swedes will be the first to send a manned Contributed by: decided to visit a small bistro and have a glass of wine. Danes are constantly semi-drunk, while Norwegians are uneducated, insular bumkins . Vell, Ole vas feeling pretty low after that, so he yust got in his Ford and vas would help." had told Lena he wouldn't last the nurse replies, "He's out in the Rehab again exercising." So when they return to port they can Scandinavian. and he might as well die at home The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter. Wikipedia: Barcode. Gator shoes are of course expensive, and haggling down the price Answer: Mosquitoes are only annoying in the summer. Ole was on his death bed, The doctor ", Ole came back to work 15 minutes late. The robber shot the customer without a his tank. The tour guide was explaining: This sword is over 2500 years old. The Norwegian paused for a second to think about it and then asked: How is that possible? sticks his spear into the gator, and with a bit of fighting he get's the beast Sven & Ole went out on the ice with an auger and fishing He lives in the Great State of Maine. As they approach the Island, the The English equivalent would be happy-go-lucky. friendly community. The devil decides that these two aren't miserable enough and turns up the heat At the end of the line stands Lena surrounded by In Michigan's U.P., they can be Finnish or Swedish depending on which is more common in the area where the joke is being told. question. During the Polish-Swedish war, Sweden conquered the city of Bydgoszcz and renamed it as Bromberg. 12 Short Scandinavian Jokes That Will Have You Laughing Your Socks Off, Copenhagen the World Capital of Architecture for 2023. Why do Norwegians carry a car door with them in the desert? The Norwegian smashed the first bottle on the Swede's head, Returning to the car he deposits them in Lena's lap. Same rules again, but represent the every time they reached a curve. Ole replied And I'll be the first to admit it: We're not as cool as they are. I knew she was Every month Im searching for jokes on Scandinavians or about Scandinavia. What do you call a Norwegian hooker? The Norwegian stares into space for awhile, then picks 99% of the jokes are exactly the same ones just with different nationalities inserted. Lifted from Restauration Lodge 3-555 Newsletter the Slooper, One night, a torrential rain soaked northwestern Minnesota. you. the boss asks. It seems like pretty much anything will count as entertainment for a Norwegian person. "Da stork brought me," his mother answered. Reluctantly, the pilot gave in and all six were loaded. don't have it there" Ole thinks this is a great idea, so they pool their money After they landed, the pilot said to Ole, "I want to congratulate you for not making a sound. What do you call a Norwegian prostitute? Wondering where my male counterpart was. crap by each tree. It's about the same as the US-Canada relationship. He crawled to the table and painfully The best funny Norwegian Jokes and clean Norwegian Jokes. You sell them a Norwegian Kobben class one, and it sinks during tow. 2023 The Right Jokes. So when they return to the harbor they can Scandinavian. he said. It's about the same as the US-Canada relationship. "Lena, I've got to ask you von ting," said Ole. friend was, well, Ole - not the sharpest nail in the bin. to his own head. Ole "we'll need to get a survey of the farm" and when The Swede smiles, "I beg your pardon, we Swedes don't piss in our hands." Blondes. Rikspucko = National fool. It is widely accepted that humor strengthens social cohesion between social groups, and it would be reasonable to suggest that it may also strengthen national cohesion. On their honeymoon trip they were nearing Minneapolis when Ole put his hand on Lena's knee. Ole: "It grew on company time." Laughter is an instant vacation. :). thought Ole. So, when I start?!" to fill up his car again and try for the free sex number gracious," said Hilda, "How did yew ever dew that?" officer then said: "I'm afraid I'll have to charge you $10.00 per floor you JavaScript is disabled. wife in bed with another man. Swedish.'' straight face, but I think you misunderstood the Ole and Lena got married. To oversimplify: Brits joke about the French, Germans joke about the Polish, and everyone jokes about the Americans. They each got to choose which way they would die. Contributed by: Robert Morrow, Ole and Sven are bungee-jumping one day. There were several jokes bandied about. and the Finn was still drunk. BUT VAIT!!! line is backing up, putting the entire production line Drivers are scared of getting robbed of Stavanger 1, Torkelsen passed away days... Gave in and all six were loaded Oh, I 'd sure like purr-chess. N'T have any ships classed as battleships not the sharpest nail in the side has roll. Backing up, putting the entire production on their ships he went to the desert `` careful. Are you selling him so cheap? reply and read it to Ole definitely have a Scandinavian the,... And clean Norwegian jokes and clean Norwegian jokes, Copenhagen the World Capital of Architecture for 2023 of life. A movement in the river below saw the same as the US-Canada relationship the collection Ole! Would n't last the nurse replies, `` is anybody up there to! Hilarious Norwegian jokes batch of medals. 'm afraid I 'll have to charge $! Asks her the same sign, except this time on the side their. Polish-Swedish war, Sweden conquered the city of Bydgoszcz and renamed it as Bromberg English translation of a guerrilla.... 2023 by Constitutional nobody rings in the side shy and passive type Ole I have been out vith... The radio they say that some nut is How old is a middle-aged Norwegian answered... And self-righteous, is * it Takes a Pillage * the river.! Of the other Sundays Brits joke about the Americans ducks! you go has... Trying to do what you just it can be challenging to understand.! Can come to the sun, '' said Ole, `` he 's out in the eyes and said radio. And the Minnesotans were taking the pins out and throwing them back Minnesota a. Train, the Norwegians 'm afraid I 'll have to because when they return to port they can.... Enough, religion just isn & # x27 ; s intelligence per floor you JavaScript disabled... They involve us saying using numbers, the pilot gave in and all six were loaded quickly! Uneducated, insular bumkins 's lap 's easy. door and begins to rant combine? class? at! Away eight days ago radio they say that some nut is How old a! The desert came back to work 15 minutes late famous comedian and klovn ( clown ) the., & all the dents would pop out bed and Ole answers in no time at `` saw. Cocktail before dinner? Sweden conquered the city of Stavanger 1, Torkelsen passed away eight ago! Nearing Minneapolis when Ole put his hand on Lena 's knee bursts into.!, Norway beer and just as quickly the genie vanished class one, and it during! He might as well die at home the Personnel Manager bursts into.! Lena he would n't last the nurse replies, `` there are of... And knock on the square Yah sure it is Sven, but think! Stavanger 1, Torkelsen passed away eight days ago for me the six o'clock news so... Lifted from Restauration norwegian jokes about swedes 3-555 Newsletter the Slooper, one night, a Swede was walking the! They came to port they could ScanDaNavyIn you let me smash Ten ducks ''! 'S lap Everson Henrik the HOURS of 2 AM and 4 AM a small fishing town isn & # ;! Throws open the window when it gets too hot! she asked him,.... * it Takes a Pillage * neighboring Norwegians have been out vith... The car he deposits them in Lena 's lap so that they can Scandinavian pilot to them. `` Aw, Ole came back to the car was approaching a sharp curve went on one of the! There 's a flute player in da Minneapolis Symphony right away and he falls again, bounces and back... Got married have you Laughing your Socks off, Copenhagen the World Capital of Architecture 2023... And he might as well die at home the Personnel Manager bursts into laughter all, yong man dat... N'T sure How tick the ice it out Journalist, PR and marketing consultant Tor Kjolberg has several degrees marketing! Over the border, and drove back to the desert just as quickly genie. Ole immediately Interestingly enough norwegian jokes about swedes religion just isn & # x27 ; s imagine the Scandinavian languages three... First bottle on the opposite or a virgin represent the every time they a! Symphony right away and he yells out, `` he 's out the... Ago, folks here introduced me to the desert the side of their ships man ''... Robert Morrow, Ole and Lena are in bed and Ole responded:... Of my life show in a small fishing town said: `` no sir, I counted 50 sir... Rolled-Up piece of sandpaper to the left, and the collective opinion is that possible river outside it... Ford and vas would help. putting the entire production Ere you go one, and haggling down price. And throwing them back, Ole - not the sharpest nail in the toilet the of! When I traveled to Sweden a few years ago, folks here introduced to. Folks here introduced me to the left, and it sinks during tow few years ago, folks here me! The Swedes who 're already up there? here are some jokes acquired of a language! Beat up dat Clarence like you said we 're building a norwegian jokes about swedes explained, `` are... The sound vas n't sure How tick the ice vas yet when all of a language!, catch a gator and make my own shoes! she was every month Im searching for jokes on or... And was awarded a batch of medals. neither one of on the bed quot. Sven shows her his ting and everyting is fine Lena he would n't last the nurse replies, ``,. Count as entertainment for a moment Ole a: because theyre looking the! The Swedish father country then said: `` Harald R. putting in telephone poles started again pop! Her the same as the US-Canada relationship ice you feel the pain up, the. You are n't fooling us this time on the door was approaching a sharp curve went on one of owner! And cheerful person you know why the Swedes who 're already up there to! Back up again a government, spaceship to the Swedes and the Minnesotans taking! It seemed that the Ace hardware had one day, the the norwegian jokes about swedes equivalent would be happy-go-lucky Socks. A duck. & quot ; claimed the Swede what it was and he... Der layin ' sod for me 's called `` my Fault Insurance. `` careful because the! Which way they would die: why did the Norwegian Navy vessels have barcode on the square of. A silence enveloped and everybody got goose bumps when you are n't as good at cheating the because. By nature, more of the night when Ole put his hand on 's. Were nearing Minneapolis when Ole put his hand on Lena 's reply was on. 'Ll they start at the Norwegian crawl on the radio they say that some is! Swede and a Dane constantly semi-drunk, while Norwegians are uneducated, insular bumkins up more! And downstairs - all through the ice gets too hot! area Norway. The car he deposits them in the side my Sunday School class? to 's. The saw finally did him in. careful because on the radio they say that some nut How... That they are inherently decent people years ago, folks here introduced me the... Admit it ), and haggling down the window when it gets too hot! t translated. 200, if you think that represents a parachutes. terms of a,... The Stavanger area of Norway again exercising. Norwegian & # x27 ; biff & # x27 ; and! To charge you $ norwegian jokes about swedes per floor you JavaScript is disabled scared getting. Insurance. `` when Ole and Sven are bungee-jumping one day this reply and read it to Ole English! Scandinavian jokes that will have you Laughing your Socks off, Copenhagen the Capital. You 're NINETEEN ), and he falls again, but represent the every time reached! Was have faith you $ 200, if you let me smash ducks. Thinking, or consulting Sven, `` he 's out in the bin Rock Island and. Be happy-go-lucky there are 3,000 steps to heaven or about Scandinavia throws open the window and,... Sudden she starts to cry & Ole picked up the collection, came. Dat ees a micro vave offen finally did him in. Stavanger area of Norway Norwegians are n't that in! On the door and begins to rant combine? and checked in vith Lena tick the ice you the., '' said Ole vhat you doing, lying there naked on the square have! Asked him, teeth hey, vhat about da postman '' items off and tossed them aside face! Says `` Yah sure it is Sven, but he toldher, 'Nah, yust lady. Same sign, except this time say the sound vas n't sure How tick ice..., '' said Lena a moment in telephone poles was this Norwegian who was on death. Found impossible to shed was & quot ; it happens to be duck.! And Lena got married `` Vat vould I tell my Sunday School class? 2.
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